Abraham Lincoln,
may his name be blessed,
has risen from his place of rest
fearing that America is sinking
beneath the weight of Third World Debt
and the moral obligation to prevent the precious oil
from falling into the hands of the Ungodly.

Hear the Word of the Lord!
Eleven score and seventeen years ago,
our fathers brought forth
upon this continent a new nation:
conceived in liberty, and dedicated
to the proposition
that all men are created equal.

Do not allow the world
to interfere with your electoral campaigns
when you come to elect a new President.
But be fair!
Do not interfere with the their electoral campaigns
when they come to elect their Leaders
in Afghanistan, Iraq, Libya and Syria.
Respect cultural differences.

If you would have your elections respected,
then you must show respect.
They should respect your casting of votes
and your ballot box.

Lead by example.

You must respect their casting of bombs.
Of the people
by the people
for the people!


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